The Amazing Race “Full Speed Ahead, Captain!” Review (Season 27, Episode 7)

The Amazing Race My Tongue Doesn't Even Twist That Way

Editor’s Note: I just got back today from the hospital after my wife delivered our second child. I’ve had about three or four hours of sleep in the last two days and I’m not operating at full capacity. If my review makes very little sense, has multiple spelling errors, or if I start talking about other shows for no reason, then you’ll know why. This should be interesting…

Anyway, The Amazing Race returned tonight with “Full Speed Ahead, Captain!”, as the teams make their way to Rotterdam AKA Amsterdam. Wait, Amsterdam and Rotterdam are not the same thing?! Oh no!

Wow, what a boneheaded move by Chac Attack. Not only did they think that two totally different teams were the same, but they were both so incredibly confident in this misinformation. Usually you hear one member of the team say something stupid and the other one will just believe them, but this time they were both so adamant about this. It was so dumb, and they were lucky that somebody pointed out the error before they went way off course to a disastrous degree.

The Road Block was one of those limited supply challenges that I always have a problem with. There were seven correct payments out there, right? One for each team? Then there were a bunch of incorrect ones, so let’s just assume that there were 30 wrong ones. That means that the person who arrives first to the challenge has a 7 in 30 shot, so they had a 23% shot of picking the right one. Then teams 1 through 6 take 6 of the right ones leaving only one correct one left. That seventh team only has a 4% shot of picking the right one! Unless the Race producers are running out and replacing the correct payments once they’re found, but you’d think the players would see them doing that and grab the right ones.

Speaking of annoying, how terrible is Justin. Not only does he freak out on poor Diana for daring to share her opinion with him, but he forces her to admit her wrongdoing to him just for his own ego. Not only is he a jerk to her, but he demands a pound of flesh when he feels she’s done something wrong. It was especially irksome at the Detour when he yelled at her for not finding the ship in distress when all he had to do was look at the freakin’ screen and see the flare being shot up!

That boat challenge did look like a lot of fun, though. It was something unique that we’d never seen on this show, and it was very easy to see what was happening. However, I was shocked that more teams didn’t pick that double dutch challenge! None of these people knew how to jump rope? All you had to do was perform a simple patty cake routine while you jumped rope for a mere 45 seconds, so you’d think some of the more athletic teams like Chac Attack or Team Texas would be inclined to try that one.

I guess it fits the theme of this season that most of the teams were dumb and picked the challenge that requires smarts. It was hilarious hearing the Texans have the self awareness to call themselves the “bottom four”, since it seems like the same four teams of Chac Attack, Mother and Son, the Paparazzis, and the Texans are always bringing up the rear. At this point it’s definitely a race between Justin and Diana and the TV Reporters, but the cheerleaders could definitely prove to be a dark horse.

What did you guys think? Sound off in the comments section below!

Random Thoughts:

– Chris mistakenly saying “Kinder-Dick” was a great way for CBS to sneak in a potentially offensive word for comedic effect. Take that, CBS censors!

– I’m a little surprised that Logan wasn’t better at the painting challenge. Doesn’t she take pictures for a living? Wouldn’t she have a pretty good eye for detail? I guess there’s a difference in studying timeless pieces of art and studying pictures of Kim Kardashian.

– It was a little funny seeing the train station sign read “Centraal Station”. Obviously that’s the way they spell it out there, but it looks like they just spelled “Central” wrong.