2 Broke Girls Season 2 Review “And the Worst Selfie Ever”

On the latest “2 Broke Girls,” Caroline found herself dealing with her very first potential STD, in the aptly-titled “And the Worst Selfie Ever.” They grow up so fast, don’t they? Class, thy name is not “2 Broke Girls.”

Things started off on a high note, as Caroline hooked back up with none other than the much-missed Candy Andy (Ryan Hansen). Max definitely approved, especially when she woke up to an “E.T.”- style candy trail, leading to the kitchen, where an entire bag of tasty treats awaited her. Seeing Caroline, clad only in a white sheet, she had this to say.

Max: “Look at you. You’re like the Greek goddess of booty calls. Aphro-whitey.”

A Greek mythology joke! Be careful, “Girls” writers, we might actually think you, like, know stuff. Needless to say, the show was back to its usual shenanigans in no time, as Caroline started feeling the after-effects of…something, shortly thereafter.

Caroline: “I feel something…down there.”
Max: “Yeah, you woke it up. Now it’s hungry. But you don’t take it back to the same restaurant.”
She later added: “It’s okay. I have one, too- except mine has a ‘Welcome’ mat.”

Getting worried as her symptoms worsened, she ultimately took a picture of her nether regions to show to Max to verify things weren’t right down there.

Caroline: “I just want to go on record- it doesn’t always look like that. It’s actually quite pretty.”
Max: “Well, now it has a good personality.”

So, it was off to the Free Clinic for the girls, so that Caroline could have things checked out- at a price, of course. Seems that the Free Clinic isn’t so free and a test costs $250! Yikes! So, Caroline is forced to confront Andy for the cash.

Caroline: “I’ll just ask Andy for a loan. But it’s actually a buy, since he ruined the property.”
Max: “Classic ‘you break it, you buy it.’.”

Caroline confronted Andy about the matter, none too happy.

Caroline: “When were you going to tell me, Andy? When my vagina burst into flames and became an actual burning bush?”

She showed Andy the phone picture, which was decidedly at odds with what he was used to seeing with Caroline.

Andy: “Wait, that’s yours?”
Max: “Worst selfie ever, right?”
Andy: “Wow. I didn’t recognize it. Was it out in the sun?”

Thankfully, it turned out to be a false alarm, and just a rash brought on by the use of Dollar Store laundry detergent. Caroline was decidedly relieved.

Caroline: “I’m not a cheap whore! I’m just poor!”

This didn’t stop Max from chiding Caroline for falling back into an easy relationship.

Max: “You are using Andy to fill a hole.”
Caroline: “Yes, Max. That’s how sex works.”

Meanwhile, Han took the plunge into the online dating world, though Oleg warned him to be careful as what he got might not always live up to what he thought he was getting.

Oleg: “You shouldn’t jump to conclusions. I once had a date with a blonde woman. Turned out the curtains matched the penis on that one.”

Indeed, Han’s first date didn’t go so well, with the girl hightailing it out of there in no time.

Han: “Is she coming back?”
Max: “Han, Jesus is coming back before she does.”

Turned out that Han was engaging in a little subterfuge, as he was using the Asian guy from “Hawaii 5-0” as his picture on the website, much to Max’s amusement.

Max: “The only thing you have in common with the guy on ‘Hawaii 5-0’ is that you are 5”0”.”

Eventually, Max helped poor Han out, hooking him up with a girl from the Free Clinic! All’s well that ends well, I guess.

So, a pretty solid episode of “2 Broke Girls” all around, with lots of great one-liners. (I also liked this one-off joke from Max: “Gutter skanks? Didn’t I see them open for Cannibal Corpse?” A Greek mythology joke and a CC-reference? Now you’re just buttering me up, “Girls.”)

Sure, the subject matter was a bit iffy, but this is “2 Broke Girls” we’re talking about, not Shakespeare, mythological references aside. It was nonetheless pretty amusing throughout, especially seeing Caroline freaking out about her situation, squirming around all over the place doing what Sophie called the “Herp Walk,” which sounds like a new dance craze.

It was also nice to see Andy again, with Hansen getting in some good lines, even without all the easy candy-themed jokes. The season is winding down, so I’m not sure if Hansen will be back- especially with the “Veronica Mars” movie now officially a go (Yay!)- but it’s nice to know the show has him on call just in case, as the character is pretty amusing overall.

What did you think of “2 Broke Girls” this week? Surprised it was Caroline that had an STD scare before Max? Did you laugh when Max announced she was “clean” and got applause from the live audience? Are you sad to see the show go for the summer? Let me know what you think in the comments!