2 Broke Girls Season 2 Review “And the Bear Truth”

Our “2 Broke Girls” finally caught a break this week in “And the Bear Truth,” and it’s high time because things haven’t exactly gone swimmingly since ye old cupcake shop opened. Actually, they ended up getting two breaks, though one turned out to be a bad idea all-around in hindsight.

First up, customer Dottie announced that she wanted the girls to cater her wedding, though Max initially had her doubts, especially given all the free samples they were doling out. Caroline rested easier when she saw the finance come in and lay one on his bride-to-be, but Max retained her suspicions, though they ultimately proved unfounded.

Max: “Nope. He’s either an out-of-work actor she hired, or he has cake in his mouth.”

More potential good news came when Han gathered everyone around at the diner.

Han: “I have an announcement to make.”
Max: “You found your first ‘down there’-hair?”

It turned out to be a raffle for a paid vacation to a log cabin getaway up in the mountains. Sophie did the honors on picking the name from the jar for a winner.

Sophie: “I get to pull a winner!”
Oleg: “She pulled me twice today and I won both times.”

Sophie tries to feel out her business card from the mix, but Caroline catches her and snitches.

Caroline: “That’s cheating!”
Sophie: “Keep out of it, Glenda the Good Bitch!” (Sophie gets another good one, yay!)

It ends up being the girls’ lucky day all around, or so it would seem, when they won the raffle. The girls were thrilled, but admit they never entered the contest, not knowing anything about it. Earl confesses that he might have tilted the bowl in their favor by putting in more than a few of their business cards.

Max: “Oh, Earl. You’re like Santa, without the weird fixation on children.”
Caroline concurs: “It was nice of Earl to enter us.”
Max can’t resist: “Oh, stop! He’s like my father!”

Things get a little more complicated when Caroline invites good old Candy Andy, making someone inevitably the third wheel, though she promises neither of them will be and that she will divide her time equally. So, off they go, with Caroline biding their travel time in the car playing road games with Andy, while Max rolls her eyes in the back.

Max: “I… spy… something annoying.”
Caroline: “Is it me?”
Max: “Yes!”

Max decides to turn the conversation to the area.

Max: “You know what this area of the mountain is known for?”
Andy: “Wineries and incest?”

The cabin turns out to be moderately impressive, with the girls particularly taken with the unique bed, which is suspended from the ceiling by four ropes on each corner- pretty cool, actually! The owner, Roger, sold it for all he was worth.

Roger: “Some say it’s like being rocked to sleep in the arms of God.”
Max: “It’s a sex bed, Roger.” (She later adds: “How about those rope beds? You know [the place is] kinky when the bed is already tied up.”)

There is one issue: said sex bed only seats two comfortably, so someone is couch-bound. This is fine by Max- she’s dealt with worse. Still, they aren’t surprised by Han’s skimping on certain things.

Max: “We should have known Han’s package would be smaller than he said it was.”

Andy wants Caroline to do a little package-handling himself, and tries to get something started while Max changes. He tries to impress her with his fire-building skills, gleaned from his days as a Boy Scout.

Caroline: “Come on over here closer to me, you big Eagle Scout.”
Andy: “Well, now you sound like my Scoutmaster.”

Caroline begs off Andy from anything just yet, wanting to spend a little quality girl time with Max and soak up the free sauna. The girls emerge in towels into the sauna, but Caroline is having a bit of a struggle.

Caroline: “How come your towel’s staying up so much better than mine?”
Max, looking down at her chest: “I can think of two reasons.”

Earlier, Caroline had warned Max and Andy of the danger of running into bears. So, when bears of a different variety show up in the sauna, Max can’t contain herself from cracking wise. Fortunately, these jolly great gays have an equally snarky sense of humor and take to M&C like bears to the woods. Needless to say, the double entendres flew fast and furious. Here’s a few of the off-color bon mots lobbed back and forth during this epic snark-off.

Bear One, commenting on the pricey Chap Stick: “No one’s lips are that chapped.”
Bear Two: “And he would know- this one’s the king of face creaming.” (Um, wow. The censors let that one slide?)

Bear Two: “I’m an astrophysicist.”
Max: “Oh- smarter than the average bear.”

Max eventually steers the topic back to her earlier focus, that the area is known for having a lot of alien abductions. She asks the bears their opinion on the subject.

Max: “Do you believe in aliens?”
Bear Two: “I believe they’re living among us. Looking at you, Christina Ricci.”

The gang goes their separate ways, but they inform M&C that they’re staying in the room right next door if they want to stop by sometime, although they have plans later to celebrate their “manniversary” which I’m sure Max thought was just “duhmazing.” (Ah, “2 Broke Girls”- truly the gift that keeps on giving, as these two terms are, um, “kookalabonza,” maybe?)

It becomes clear that it will be sooner than later when Andy seeks to spend a little leisure time with Caroline. Understandably, but not only for the obvious reasons, but, as the girls discover, it’s also the poor guy’s birthday and his own girlfriend forgot, so there’s that. Whoops!

Caroline offers to skip dinner in favor of birthday snuggle time.

Caroline: “It’s always better to make love on an empty stomach.”
Max: “That must be why there’s so many people in India.”

Max makes tracks asap to avoid the subsequent awkwardness, though not as soon as she’d like. Thankfully, it’s the bears to the rescue, who happily invite her in.

Max: “I promise I won’t stay here all night. Don’t want to get caught in the middle of your Country Bear Jamboree.” (The Disney fan in me loved that one the most… a gay Disney joke! Gotta love it!)

Meanwhile, Caroline attempted to do a sexy dance for Andy to make up for the slight. It is not pretty, to say the least. At one point she actually asked him if he wanted to see her “twerk” it. Yikes! I’m afraid that she might have disjointed her back if she even tried. Caroline’s pretty, but holy crap was that dancing bad, which Andy certainly agreed was true.

Andy: “After that dance. Sweetie, it’s hard to believe you’ve ever had sex.”

Unfortunately, that seems to be the case across the board, as it’s revealed that Caroline and Andy haven’t been intimate since before the store opened- quite some time ago, in other words. Factor in the birthday mishap and Andy has had enough. Sadly, and somewhat suddenly, he breaks up with her. I must admit, I didn’t see that coming.

While the fact that Andy works across the way from our girls may yet mean a future reconciliation with Caroline on down the line, I was still surprised how much I hated to see this happen. I kinda like Andy; though, much like the nature of Max’s affections, it might have been the whole candy thing. Still, forgetting the birthday…kind of a game changer, I guess. Toss in no sex and all work and no play makes Andy a dull boy. Who can blame the guy?

Upon their return, Andy comes into the shop to say hi so that things will hopefully not be too awkward. Caroline surprises him with a birthday cupcake, but Andy isn’t feeling very celebratory, post-break-up.

Caroline: “Happy Birthday!” (Indicates cupcake, which has a flaming candle atop it.) “Now, come on! Blow!”
Andy: “I don’t really feel like doing that.”
Max, having the last word, as well she should: “Welcome to our world.” (Yes, folks, that’s two oral sex jokes- count ‘em- for those keeping score at home! Plus, a bonus “handy-J” one just for good measure. Way to sleep on the job, CBS censors…not that I’m complaining, mind you!)

All in all, a solid episode, with some big laughs throughout, especially the whole “bear” business. Well played, “2 Broke Girls.” Well played, indeed.

Did I miss any of your favorite jokes? Did you find the “bear” thing amusing, too? Would you have rather seen Max do the sexy dance? Let me know in the comments!