Survivor: South Pacific “Then There Were Five” Review

When you really stop to think about it, it’s quite impressive that the five people we saw forming an alliance on day one are the ones on day 32 who are boasting the episode title in scene one: “Then there were five!” Yes, Survivor returned tonight by showing us the five Upolu members who vowed to stick together returning to camp, and quickly gathered around for one of their awkward impromptu prayers.

After an odd scene of Albert talking about blindsiding Sophie and going with Rick and Coach to the end (Why would you want to go to the end with Coach?!), we get right to the Redemption Island duel! MAN, was that one close! My palms were sweating and my heart was racing, and I totally thought that Edna had it there for a second! I’m sad to see her go, since I thought she really got a raw deal with being the sixth wheel on Upolu, but I’m glad to see Ozzy still going strong!

What was up with Coach today? I seriously was just typing about how controlled and calm he’s been in this game, and how he hasn’t been jumping down anybody’s throats and gotten anybody upset, but then he flips his freaking wig when Brandon walks over. I mean, I know what he’s trying to do. He’s trying to get mad at Brandon for no reason so that writing his name down won’t feel like it’s coming out of nowhere, but it seemed so manufactured to me. It isn’t like Brandon ran over there and started demanding that they tell him what he was talking about, he was just trying to get in on their conversation!

It didn’t matter anyways, since Brandon won his first individual immunity challenge in an awesome immunity/reward game. Since Brandon was the target to go next due to his sporadic behavior, we got an awesome good ol’ fashioned yelling match to help determine who the next person voted out will be. Rick and Albert almost came to blows as they yelled at each other about what Albert did or didn’t say. I felt a little bad for Albert, as it eventually turned into everybody ganging up on him and he just kept digging himself a deeper grave. It seemed like Albert was a shoe-in to get sent to Redemption next, but then tribal council happened…

Brandon, oh Brandon. While the surrender of the immunity necklace wasn’t quite as dumb as Eric giving it to Natalie back on Fans Vs. Favorites, it was still pretty dumb. I get that he’s in a way testing Albert’s allegiance to him and the tribe, but if you’re trying to win Survivor then there’s just no reason to do that. Some people might defend Brandon for his spirituality and altruism, and I do commend him for being such an honest guy (to a fault), but he still kinda bugs me. I mean, there are millions of people who would love to be on this game, and when you fill this spot with a 19 year old kid who apparently has no real interest in winning the whole thing, it just keeps somebody else out of the game that would really love it.

Either way, we’re definitely heading into an interesting finale this Sunday, and I’ll see you all there!

Random Thoughts:

– Ozzy’s freaking red stain looks so ridiculous on day 33. Should have thought about that before you slammed that egg on your shirt on day one, huh Ozzy?

– Does anybody else watch the Ponderosa videos on I think the jet-ski pizza delivery guy was the cook from Ponderosa.

– Probably my favorite line of the entire season so far: “I know God doesn’t want you to vote me out, man.”