AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL “LaToya Jackson” Review

AMERICA’S NEXT TOP MODEL “La Toya Jackson” Cycle 17 Episode 5 – The first few minutes are spent on the girls whinging about how they have to step up their game. I have to admire the shows’ producers to allow Angelea’s confession that after America’s Next Top Model she was not wanted by any modelling agency. The girls get really really confused about math, so when Bianca tries to clear up the times with Shannon, the latter bursts into tears. Biana narrates the sequence beautifully: “So now the crying Christian is going off and I’m just standing there like this: I didn’t do it…before I could say anything, Lisa, sheriff of Top Model town jumps in.”

The girls are sent to the Santa Monica pier where they’re met by the Kardashians who offers the winner clothes. The walkway is a carousel ride, which should be as ridiculous as it looks. Is it wrong of me to feel bad that the Kardashians didn’t even get their own show, that instead this episode is named for La Toya Jackson. The runway is disastrous and looks really really really stupid. The girls literally leap onto the carousel and then leap back off like freaking Indiana Jones triple lite. These models are supposed ‘all-stars’ but they all seem to have crappy walks.

So, that was embarrassing. The Kardashians, because there is more than one of them, which is what tends to happen when there are three people, chose more than one winner. Bre and Lisa won the Kardashian collection, which has to be one of the worst prizes in Top Model history.

Bianca says she’s about to flippin’ punch somebody because she’s taking “shit from the Christian, taking shit from the crazy one.” So there’s a lot of drama and later there’s a coalition against Bianca to get rid her.

Oh god. The photo shoot challenge for the week is to dress up and pose like Michael Jackson through the years. It’s pretty fun, especially when Lisa gets to the splits.

Most of the photos are praised but Lisa’s is destroyed and it’s pretty obvious she’s headed for the door. La Toya ordered the photos from best to worst, and the best was Laura’s, followed by Shannon, Dominique, Allison, Alexandria, Kayla, Bre, Bianca. The bottom two are Angelie and Lisa. And…oh. Tyra has two photos in her hands. So that’ll mean double elimination soon…yay!

What did you think of this episode? Sound off in the comments below.

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