THE X FACTOR UK 2011 “Auditions 6” Review

THE X FACTOR UK “Auditions 6” Season 8 Episode 6 – The X Factor has come to Wales. Listen to their accents; looks at their names. They’re obsessed with the ‘y’s and with rolling their ‘r’s. You know there’re going to be some crazy auditions here.

First up is flirty Natasha who’s determined to get Gary “some”. And while she sets about trying to woo him with some low dips dances and her hefty thighs, her voice fails to impress. Kelly, intimidated by this Welsh wildling, skirts around the edge and tries to tell her in many words that she wasn’t fantastic. Tulisa came right out and told her she was terrible.

And roll the montage of terrible jokey auditions. This gets a fair few good one-liners from the judges, but doesn’t offer much in the way of talent.

The next decent audition comes from John Adams, a math teacher with a silky voice who tackles Damien Rice’s Cannonball. Despite some awkward stage manoeuvres he impresses the judges – particularly Tulisa who suddenly begins drivelling about equations. He also gets the crowd on his feet and he is sent through. He might just be the new Matt Cardle, except the new Matt Cardle whose voice does not sound like a hamster with a hernia. But he’s handsome and he’s got a good voice and he’s collected: he might just win.

Michelle Barrett, mother of four, takes on All The Man I Need. Her performance is good, but the real emotion comes when Tulisa passes judgement and breaks down telling her that she reminds her of her mother. It’s a lovely moment which doesn’t dither in sentimentality, and even though Tulisa is in tears she still manages to be analytical-yet another reason why she trumps Cheryl, whose tears usually stemmed from some self indulgent traumatic event and left her a blithering idiot. On the other hand-the editing in the beginning of the show made Tulisa’s tears look like something caused by Louis, which just shows how dastardly editing can be.

2 Shoes, a duo whose big ambition is to use the money from The X Factor to buy themselves a micro pig, surprises the judges with a well rehearsed, lovely rehearsal. They have great personalities and, frankly, they had me at micro pig. Kelly says no, which at least shows that her opinion is her own-and that’s even more evident as she goes toe to toe with Louis and Tulisa on differing opinions. She’s hypersensitive on groups, and won’t let a single one below brilliant nab a yes vote from her.

John Wilding, who made it to judges houses last year, gets the audience on their feet with his bowler hat and smooth moves. He seems to have spent the whole year ridding his face of pimples. He gets a standing ovation from the judges of the audition rounds. And he’s through with aplomb.

Are there any frontrunners in your mind yet?

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