THE VAMPIRE DIARIES “The Birthday” Review

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES "The Birthday" Season 3 Premiere (5)

THE VAMPIRE DIARIES “The Birthday” Season 3 Episode 1 – What better 18th birthday present can a girl get than a silent phonecall from her darkside vampire boyfriend who is slaying humans and werewolves up and down the eastern seaboard? How about the gift of seeing Damon in all his naked glory? You know, Elena Gilbert really is a lucky girl.

The third year of The Vampire Diaries is upon us and our heroine is only just turning eighteen, which is kind of crazy if you consider just how much she’s been through. Crazier still are the events going on around her. With Klaus’ curse broken and her vampiric boyfriend AWOL, Elena is now pretty much a regular girl, so, knowing this, is the season 3 premiere any good?

I’m not sure how I feel about this episode, to be completely honest. On the one hand, the focus being pulled away from Elena gave the other characters a lot of screentime and it feels much more like the true ensemble show it was always on the verge of being. On the other hand, very little happened in this episode compared to the previous season premieres. One of the reasons I love TVD is that they manage to pack two seasons worth of plot into every single season without it seeming compressed or shoddily written. With such a slow plot, this week felt a little Dawson’s Creek at times. Still, it was an enjoyable watch and the cliffhanger was killer.

So let’s take a look at what some of the characters were up to this week:

Stefanus (yeah, I know, but he’s a bit of an ass, so the nickname works twice as well now) is still hanging out with Klaus two months after the season 2 finale. Their bromance is twisted but also epic – Stefanus first dismembers and then reassembles two women in their search for a werewolf, and then Stefanus tortures said werewolf by playing a game of ‘Truth or Wolfsbane’ (in which he dips darts into wolfsbane and then uses the werewolf as a dartboard).

And then he goes back to Mystic Falls to tell Damon to stop trying to track him down. But Stefanus isn’t like our beloved Stefan, oh no, he’s epic, so he sends the message by making Reporter Girl kill herself right in front of Damon. Evilness aside, Stefan seems to be doing it because he cares about Damon and doesn’t want Klaus to come after him. Awww. And he even called Elena and listened in silence while she told him how much she loved him. Double Awww. But still, I prefer Stefanus to Stefan. He may be a complete bastard but he’s damned good at it.

Alaric and Jeremy angsted a lot this week. For Alaric, this meant drinking, going on field trips with Damon, and then finally moving out of the Gilbert’s house because he’s ‘not a good role model’. I really wanted Elena to explain that she doesn’t want a role model, that they all need each other because they have no one else, but she didn’t. I’m hoping he goes to stay with Damon because their bromance is fast becoming one of my favourite things about this show. Meanwhile, Jeremy got high, saw his dead ex-girlfriends a few times, and got a pep talk from the One True Human, Matt, who completely misunderstood the situation but is adorable anyway.

Kickass Caroline and Tywolf finally got together this week. Ignoring the hows and whys (even if the whys include the best reasoning ever – ‘I’m horny’), it’s a pairing that is just brilliant for this series. Firstly, they have actual chemistry. Secondly, they could accidentally kill each other. I’m hoping Tywolf wore protection because I’d hate for them to find out all wolf bodily fluids are toxic for vampires after an amazing night together. Not that sex is their biggest problem right now – I think that may be Mrs Lockwood shooting Caroline up with vervain. I can understand you being upset about a hot young thing sneaking out of your son’s bedroom, but sheesh lady! Let’s just hope that Tywolf can save the day before his mother does something she’ll probably end up regreting…

What did you think of ‘The Birthday’? Are you glad ‘The Vampire Diaries‘ is back? Leave your thoughts in the comments below!