TRAFFIC LIGHT “Where The Heart Is” Review

TRAFFIC LIGHT “Where The Heart Is” Episode 11 – Okay, okay. This show may actually be close to winning me over. There. I said it.

It was a grudging thing at first, and the couple dynamics are still a little weird; like pretty much the girls win every confrontation (or they at least get in the best digs). But this episode was enjoyable on a number of small levels.

Now I’m not exactly ready to throw my hands up and declare the next Friends—some perspective here, please—but at the very least it was able to showcase its people in a more favorable light. The GPS rivalry between Mike (Dave Denman) and Lisa (Liza Lapira, who improves with every episode) was fun in that you really weren’t sure where it was going to go; double irony points for the fact that Lisa finally found him using that tried and true method of knowledge coupled with intuition.

I still don’t know what would attract a girl to a caveman like Mike (I guess he has money, there’s that), but hey. It seemed to work here, and I found myself drawn into their little war of attrition.

Less amusing was the always-used “look what I found in my boyfriend’s man-purse” (?) snafu, wherein the woman thinks the item (in this case a book) is there for one reason when in fact it’s there for a completely different one. For me it was a little on the weird side, and not simply due to my “Kill Callie” crusade. Sure, having Callie (Aya Cash) trying to pretend to be a … what was that … misbehaving cheerleader is interesting in theory, but really it was just sort of squirm-inducing and skeevy.

(And no, this is not one of those rants where I go off on the sexualization of minors by today’s media, blah blah blah. You’d have to be a complete moron to believe a 15-year old Britney Spears was looking to illicit support for scholastic athletics when she pranced around in a high school hallway dressed in … whatever that was. The record company wanted her to just dance and sing on an oversized spinning record in order to try and play up to her squeaky clean Disney fanbase; she nixed it. The skanky cheerleader thing was her idea. Saying that the media is responsible for the moral collapse of society is putting blame where it should not lie. If you want to blame someone, blame bad parenting. And then go and watch Toddlers & Tiaras if you don’t buy that.)

(Rant over. Where was I? Traffic Light? How the hell did this become about Britney Spears? Focus!)

Anyway, the whole underage seduction thing was wince-inducing, but I did love how Adam (Nelson Franklin) became motivated to “explore his character,” even going so far as to narrate his new “roleplaying” character’s backstory to Mike and Ethan. That’s not a pervert at work, my friends—that’s a Dungeons & Dragons nerd.

And I have to say, Adam’s boss Kev (a perfectly cast Rob Huebel) is a bro. No, he’s not a bro. He’s a Bro. Capital B. This dude would Ice you in a second. “Two chicks on a Jet-Ski, their badonks all tooted…”

(It’s messed up that I know what a badonk is. You crazy kids.)

(Now what the hell does “tooted” mean?)

We need more Kev.

Finally, Ethan’s situation with the transplant organs was itself amusing, even if Ethan (Kris Marshal) continues to be underwhelming. I just don’t buy this hangdog Brit as a ladies man. It’s like FOX had a lineup of below-average actors to play Ethan, and just decided to go with the guy with the British accent. Because that’s just automatically hot, right?

(I used to think so too. But … mm, no.)

Anyway… a promising episode despite the small problems. I was entertained. B-minus.

If you like tooted badonks, follow me on Twitter! That’s @Axechucker, you skeevs!