THE BORGIAS “Lucrezia’s Wedding” Review

THE BORGIAS "Lucrezia's Wedding" (Showtime)

THE BORGIAS “Lucrezia’s Wedding” Season 1 Episode 4 – The Borgias went all Cruel Intentions this week as Lucrezia seeks kissing advice from her father’s whor Giulia (is that what we’e calling her?) prior to her big wedding day. Well, it almost went there. It stopped somewhere around the apricots.

There are two sides to The Borgias: the stories directly involving the Borgias clan, and the stories involvig those who wish to take down the Borgias clan. Cardinal Della Rovere is a part of the latter series of stories, and I regret to say that he is a most dreadfully dull villain. Am I a horrible person for hoping he’ll go on a pillaging expedition and/or mass murder spree in the next episode? Preferably whip out samurai swords or a minigun (or both). There was a meeting in this episode featuring Cardinal Della Rovere, Lorenzo de Medici and Niccolo Machiavelli and I swear to god that there was more villainy and manipulation going on at my granny’s monthly crochet circle than at this snoozefest. And I say this as a total history nerd.

The main storyline of this episode revolved around Lucrezia’s wedding. This episode was far more entertaining than last week. I spent far less time trying to figure out who the hell each character was and far more time just enjoying Jeremy Iron’s bumbling performance as the pope. Plus, the story is finally getting into one of the more interesting chapters in history: Lucrezia has finally moved out of the safety of her house and is now living with her boorish, tight ass husband who considers the wedding put on by the Borgias, complete with mommy courtesans, pope playmates and a sex show (okay, maybe for the daughter of the ruler of the Vatican the wedding was a teensy bit controversial) but that was no reason to, you know, rape her. It seems like Sforza (Lucrezia’s hubby) runs a pretty awful household, and this is sure to churn out some interesting storylines.

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Random Thoughts

Thank you Lucrezia. All of your incestuous face rubbing points out what we’ve all wanted to know: Cesare totally has a butt chin.

“My dusky friend inhabits my dreams.” Oh brother. The writing is problematic: The Borgias just does not have the quality acting needed to pull off such archaic dialogue. Lucrezia espcially has a weird habit of pausing at random places in the middle of a conversation.

Is it just me, or did the music at the wedding suddenly get modern-or, at least, as modern as you can get with a lute.

Cesare finally seems to have found himself a love interest-a beautiful woman bored with her current choice of husband, and this choice of husband has it out for Cesare. Nothing is ever simple and easy going with these people, is it?

What did you think of this episod? Sound off in the comments below!

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