AMERICAN IDOL “Top 8 Results” Review

American Idol Top 7

AMERICAN IDOL “Top 8 Results” Season 10 Episode 27 – The one thing I can say about results night is I sure like duets better than group medleys. It’s like night and day; even though these kids have been better at the group stuff than some of the kids from seasons past, it’s still painful to watch. “Glee” just isn’t my thing.

The pairings were natural. It didn’t shock me to see Scotty McCreery singing with Lauren Alaina, and then we basically got to see Haley school Casey in singing jazz. (And then we got to see her receive a back-handed compliment after the general disdain the judges gave her yesterday.)

Ahh, who cares. For once the women were safe. Sadly, Paul McDonald got the boot! One of Sandie’s Boyz are gone, hitting the road until the time comes to… well, hit the road with the American Idol tour. I’m not crying any tears for Paul. He’ll be fine.

In fact I think he’ll be more than fine. McDonald has a voice producers would drool over. He’s going to make records, and if the writing is any good at all they will be hits. That’s not the niche I see for someone like, say, Casey Abrams, who doesn’t have a very commercial voice at all. Abrams is very niche specific, and almost completely Jazz. And ladies and gentlemen: the kids ain’t really buying jazz these days.

The rest of the show was interesting enough. I’m not sure who told Rob Reiner he was attractive as a stand-up comic; he should stick to directing and leave the Jewish jokes back in the 20th century where they belong. (Though admittedly the “From Justin to Kelly being overlooked come Oscar time due to politics” crack was pretty funny, especially given the fact that Kelly Clarkson was in the house.)

I liked Clarkson’s duet with … I’m not sure who that was. A stockier Kenny Chesney? I’ve never heard of Jason Aldean. It looked like someone ran up behind him and yanked his cowboy hat down over his eyes as a joke. And he just forgot to fix it.

Or at least I enjoyed the song live. Hearing it on iTunes makes it sound like every other power ballad I’ve ever heard. Like … I liked that song better back in the ’80’s when it was called “Almost Paradise,” with Mike Reno and Anne Wilson playing hooky away from Loverboy and Heart respectively. That’s all I’m saying.

But hey. It went platinum. Those dudes won’t sweat one negative review from me.

What else? Oh yeah, the four boys (Jacob, James, Paul, and Stefano) singing a Simon and Garfunkel (sorry, Chennie) “The Sound of Silence / Mrs. Robinson” montage was only slightly wince-inducing. Jacob Lusk should never be in a group. Ever. He just looks out of shape and uncomfortable when he’s not the center of the spotlight. And why does Stefano always look so guilty for surviving week to week? He’s not freaking Sanjaya.

And Rihanna was Rihanna. I kind of wished those backup dancers and their long “California King” sheets had some aerial dancing for us. The lack of it only makes me remember how ballsy P!NK was for that 2010 Grammy production of “Glitter in the Air.”

Next week: down to 7! (Another girl goes down. Or Stefano.)

Follow me on Twitter! That’s @Axechucker, you out of shape, spotlight-hogging divas!