WAREHOUSE 13 “Age Before Beauty” Review

Warehouse 13 (Syfy)

Myka and Pete go undercover at New York’s Fashion Week to learn what is rapidly aging models on the “Age Before Beauty” episode of WAREHOUSE 13. An elderly Russian woman dies after walking into an Italian fashion show shouting “they stole me.” Pete and Myka identify her via her breast implants as a nineteen year old model and Claudia and Artie find similar cases in other cities, so Pete and Myka head to New York where Myka poses as a model. An old woman with ruby earrings stares as Myka walks the runway then transfers millions to a seemingly young photographer’s bank account. After the photographer develops doubly-exposed photos of Myka and the old woman, the old woman becomes young while Pete is suddenly holding a quite elderly Myka. With Artie and Claudia’s help, Pete tracks down the photographer and Man Ray’s camera and Artie reverses Myka’s aging by snapping a picture of the photographer (who’s 98, by the way) over one of Myka.

I love the artifacts the writers come up with. Man “All critics should be assassinated” Ray’s camera. I would never have guessed that one, but Ray was incredibly innovative and a big part of the surrealist movement, so it totally works. We also get a glimpse of Excalibur at the beginning of the episode and learn that the original Original Ray’s pizza is in the warehouse.

There are the usual tired modeling jokes tonight and Myka is correct when she says she doesn’t have an extra five pounds after being called fat (please), but Damien the designer is snarky fun and the model’s “What, are we opening a Walmart?” when she spots Pete and Myka is one of my favorite lines of the night. She’s obviously never seen the People of Walmart blog. I don’t ship Pete and Myka, but his reassuring her of her beauty is adorable and that is definitely a killer dress. Fortunately they keep the tone mostly light after Myka ages. It’s sweet without crossing into saccharine territory, thank goodness. “Other than a sudden urge to hit the early bird special, I’m fine.” Of course Pete won’t acknowledge his sweet moment with Myka after she’s okay.

In other news, Townie Todd is texting Claudia. Artie approves because he’s “inoffensive,” so Claudia agrees to a date-I mean a coffee/pie summit-and Artie sends her off, telling her to be herself. She orders chili and things go downhill from there until Claudia runs off, saying “I’m clearly a closed book with bad breath who’s too freakish to live.” Ha! Artie struggles through his role as father figure, stammering and shuddering as he calls her a woman but he eventually figures it out and helps Claudia and Todd try again.

Warehouse 13 is pushing the “we are family” theme hard so far this season and it’s starting to make me nervous. Is the rug going to be pulled out from under them? We’ll see, but for now I’m just happy with another solid episode. Next week is the Eureka crossover and it looks good. Are you excited?

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