CSI “All That Cremains” Review

CSI "All That Cremains"

CSI “All That Cremains” Season 11 Episode 14 – Did somebody change CSI into a character based drama and not tell me about it? “All That Cremains” marks the third week in a row that we’ve had a strong character concentration at the center of the episode. Two episodes we had the focus on Greg, and last week we got a good look at the backstory and relationships of Sara. This week we get to meet Ray’s ex-wife, Gloria.

Gloria is getting married to Phil Baker, played by Dean Norris of Breaking Bad fame. It looks like Norris will just be playing the “nice guy” role that he plays so well as Hank on Breaking Bad, but he probably won’t get anything else interesting to do. I’ve always thought that if he didn’t have Aaron Paul and Bryan Cranston outshining him during Emmy season, Dean Norris might have had a few nods for his great job on Breaking Bad. It’s good to see that he’s keeping busy during BB’s long hiatus!

Anyway, this is a CSI review! I’ve just been missing Breaking Bad is all. There’s not much else to say about the rest of the episode. Christina Milian’s turn as Sydney Preston was underwhelming, which was disappointing considering I had a crush on her in American Pie.

Can we talk about the ending now, please? This was possibly the most unbelievable killer I’ve ever seen on CSI. Even if your dad got you REALLY mad, it takes some kind of psycho to feed him your mom’s ashes and cut him up into pieces. There was just no set-up to this ending at all, and no way for the audience to believe that this little girl would be capable of such a gruesome murder. Also, this priest living across the street seemed to notice everything happening at their household, so why didn’t he see the blood-soaked psycho dropping off several boxes of body parts in his front lawn?

“All That Cremains” ended up not spending too much time on Ray’s ex-wife, but it’s good that we’ve introduced the character of Julia and Phil for future episodes. Hopefully seeing some more Dean Norris on TV will tide me over until Breaking Bad returns in July! Overall this was a pretty good episode despite the ridiculous ending.

Random Thoughts:

– I had no idea “cremains” was even a word. I thought it was just a bad pun in the title, but turns out it’s just what you somebody’s cremated remains! I learned something new!

– Fun CSI Trivia: Ian Reed Kesler, who played the jerk casting director Vince Trufant, has been on all three CSI shows! He was on the CSI: Miami episode “A Horrible Mind” in 2002, and on the CSI: NY episode “Live or Let Die” in 2006. Now you’ve learned something new!

– Next week we see the return of Justin Bieber. Here’s to hoping he’s in the middle of the large explosion we saw in the trailer.

About The Author

Luke is a licensed insurance agent by day, and a sharp-tongued TV reviewer by night. He sells entertainment insurance to people working in the TV and film industry, and then turns around to review their work! Apart from leading this conflicted life, he plays a lot of video games and enjoys his life in beautiful Santa Clarita, California with his wife and small pomeranian puppy. He hopes you enjoy his reviews, but also secretly hopes you disagree whole-heartedly because those comments are just as entertaining!

  • TJ

    Did anyone else catch the ITTY BITTY GSR reference– Sara used another baseball analogy…something like “well, this is homeplate…”

  • C Erryn Randolph

    Soo, they couldn’t find a good enough plot and had to steal from an Asian horror flick? Ok… Still a fun episode.

  • C Erryn Randolph

    Soo, they couldn’t find a good enough plot and had to steal from an Asian horror flick? Ok… Still a fun episode.

  • http://lifeasacynic.blogspot.com/ synical

    I also had no idea “cremains” is a word – it’s counted as a portmanteau, no?

    My only niggle was Ray wearing his wedding ring the entire episode until Nick suggest that he take it off before going to his ex-wife’s wedding. He could have taken it off at any point in the episode and we had to wait til the end? Really, CSI writers?

    I think the reason why no one noticed the blood soaked kid is because the priest had probably moved out already… I’m pretty sure it’s mentioned at some point that he moved out. And, no one could tell that it was blood at that time of night. Just a theory.